Week 9 (part 1) – Girls night! Hosted by R-Beezy, joined by Carlotta and Jodie.

I did so much cheesing (read: eating) that this past weekend that I’m splitting this week into two entries, one for Saturday and one for Sunday.

Saturday began with Dominic, Byron, and I; all a little worse for wear from our respective Friday night shenanigans, making breakfast and marathoning The X-Files (both of these things I dropped the ball on, but I’ll get into that). We were breaking in my new waffle iron, which, if you don’t have one, do yourself a favor and get one. They’re like 30 bucks tops on Amazon and it’s the coolest little gadget I now own. Dominic and Byron opted for a savory waffle, adding chevre, spinach, ham, and bacon on top of theirs, whereas I’m a straight sugar and starch kind of gal. D & B, like the champs and good friends they are, powered through their waffles, whereas I had one bite and literally spit it out. Waffles of Insane Greatness (the actual title of the recipe) my ass. I’m no cooking wiz, far from it, but let me just tell you that I followed that recipe to the letter. The end result was an inedible waffle that tasted like straight flour. Ball #1 dropped.

We (Dominic and I) held off from watching the new season of The X-Files specifically so we could binge watch all six episodes at once as opposed to watching weekly (what is this, 2007?). However, after two hours, and some confusion as to how David Duchovny and Gillian Anderson could still look so good, we put together that we were watching the last two episodes of the old season (circa 2001), wasting precious binge time. 4 hours later and we only got through the first few. Ball #2 dropped. We are now a full-fledged male.

Girls night!

Reina was gracious enough to host us for girls night, although who are we kidding, that girl is Martha Stewart on crack (not that I'm implying Reina’s on crack, just that Martha would have to do crack to keep up. ‘Say crack one more time’). The plan was a fondue night, but we came prepared with backups in the event our fondue did not turn out. I brought Mahón cheese (one of Dana’s recommendations and a big hit overall), while Reina had a Wensleydale cheese with apricots and Montchevré goat cheese with honey (in addition to the Apple Smoked Gruyere and Swiss that we used for fondue) on top of lots and lots of other food and accoutrement.

Mahón: Mahón cheese is a semi-hard cheese made from cow’s milk from the Mahón port on the island of Minorca off the coast of Spain. Minorca widely known and respected for their cheeses, and today is one of Spain’s largest producers of milk. Aged for approximately 10 months, the cheese has a bright orange rind, stemming from being hand rubbed with butter and paprika oil. Originally, recogedores (or pickers) stored their cheese in deep underground caves for aging, paying close attention to outside elements, such as wind or temperature change to perfect their flavor. Today, they have perfected their methods, breeding their cattle for health and genetic selection. This is a creamy cheese with a slightly salty flavor stemming from the salt content in the grasses the cows eat. Our thoughts: As previously mentioned Carlotta and I particularly liked this cheese. We polished it off pretty easily, even with all the other food we had. I didn’t about the paprika rind ahead of time, and I now wish I had paid more attention to it. On its own, the cheese is buttery and sweet, with the salty undertones. I found it was excellently pained with orange fig jam and a crostini to round all the flavors out. Wensleydale cheese with apricots: Wensleydale cheese is a semi-soft, crumbly, moist, cheese originally produced in Wensleydale, North Yorkshire, England. Wensleydale was first made by French monks that had settled in the region using sheep’s milk. In the 14th century they began using cow’s milk, only adding in some sheep’s milk for texture. The addition of the sheep’s milk also allowed the cheese to grow blue mold, giving it a signature blue color. Today, this blue coloring is very rare to find. Wensleydale Creamery produces five types of Wensleydale cheese- Real Yorkshire Wensleydale (what we had), Mature Wensleydale, Extra Mature Wensleydale, Blue Wensleydale and Oak Smoked Wensleydale, the difference being the ages and flavors. It’s often best paired with a fruit (the local saying- 'an apple pie without the cheese is like a kiss without the squeeze'), ours was mixed with apricots, but you can also find it being made with cranberries or blueberries.

Our thoughts: This cheese didn’t get as much love (at least from me anyway) because it just didn’t look appetizing. I know, I was judging a cheese by its cover. It looked like a fruit cake (coincidently it’s something the cheese if often paired with) and I don’t often associate fruit cakes with tasting good. After getting past my visual beef with the cheese, it actually tasted really good. Reina had sweet potato flavored Triscuts (also very good if you’ve never tried them) and the sweet and salty flavor of the crackers went very nicely with the sweet and salty favors of the cheese. Montchevré's goat cheese with honey: Founded in 1989 in Preston, Wisconsin (now located in Belmont, WI) founders Arnaud Solandt and Jean Rossard began producing 3 different cheeses; Le Cabrie, Chèvre in Blue and Chevriotte—all of which they still make. Today, they produce 50 different kinds of goat cheeses. Montchevré utilizes over 360 local family farms that produce their milk exclusively for them. Led by 4th generation French Cheese-Maker Jean Rossard, Montchevré blends traditional French goat cheeses with American flavors to produce their wide array of flavors. Our thoughts: Not quite as good as the blueberry goat cheese from week 5 (meaning I didn’t feel the need to be lathered in it). The honey flavor was very mild (honey granules are folded into the cheese during the production process). I could have gone for a little more sweetness to balance out the tart flavor of the goat cheese. This too paired really well with the orange fig jam, giving it that bit of sweetness that I was missing from the cheese itself. Fondue: Our fondue came out surprisingly well considering that: A. Reina and I both had prior unsuccessful attempts under our belts, and B. We did not follow any of the directions of the recipe. Such as:

What the recipe called for: Rubbing garlic on the bottom of the caquelon (fondue pot). What we did: Spread some fig jam on it.

What the recipe called for: Adding wine or beer. What we did: Added Not Your Father's Ginger Ale (which if you haven't tried that or Not Your Father's Root Beer you need to be getting on it).

What the recipe called for: Coating the cheese in flour before adding cheese in slowly. What we did: None of that.

Our fondue came out a little chunkier than it should be, but tasted great! Big ups to Rei for successfully winging it.

At the end of the evening, with full stomachs and sleepy eyes, Carlotta and I decided to Uber instead of driving home. I’ve had pretty good experience with Uber drivers, I don’t mind making the small talk, always eager to hear stories of other crazies they’ve picked up. This particular driver, in the most Portland-equse fashion, had a dyed-pink mustache. I told her I needed a photo with him so I could write about him in my cheese blog. So here’s to you Uber driver! Thanks for getting us home safe!

Part 2: Sunday Brunch & Oscar Night is coming. Stay tuned!